Important Safety Update from the Met Police

We have an important update.

The Metropolitan Police have informed us that on World Zombie Day (October 7th) there will be a group called “Football Lads Alliance” holding a controversial march in London. There are an estimated 20,000 people expected to be marching between 13:00 and 18:00 from Park Lane to Westminster.

The Metropolitan Police have been in touch with every group and venue operating in London on October 7th. We have thus decided to provide this warning for all our zombies.

Don’t panic! As with every other difficulty provided by this tumultuous yet unwavering city, we will carry on. Nothing can stop zombies (except for walls, fire, deep holes, and destroying our brains, obviously).

While the FLA has repeatedly insisted it is a ‘non-racist, non-violent’ organisation, anti-fascist and equality groups like Stand Up To Racism have questioned the backgrounds of those involved – and their true motives.

To provide transparency and help inform you of the actual risk, our contact with the Met Police have advised us:

During the June march organised by the FLA, there were a number of altercations involving members of this procession after the march had ended. A large number of these altercations were within the West End of London. The Met Police are concerned that the level of violence may be repeated this year, however many precautions are being put in place.

The Met Police are taking extra measures based on current tensions and concerns based on intelligence from previous marches held by similar groups and are committed to their duty to ensure that the community in central London can go about their daily business not unduly impacted by demonstrations taking place.

We have been lurching these streets yearly, for an entire decade. We have built a relationship with the police and the city. This relationship and reputation will provide us with security. This is because we’re collected, we’re cooperative, we’re polite, we’re fun, and we’re the best damnable zombies you could ever hope to encounter. Every year we advise participants not to bring weapons: no fake weapons, no fantasy weapons, and DEFINITELY no real weapons. We do this because, if there is an incident, we don’t want you to be perceived as a threat during the confusion. Please pay special attention to the no weapons policy this year.

Additionally, we have adjusted our TOP SECRET route so that we march through an entirely different part of London. We are very excited about bringing you this new route, and can’t wait for you to see the exciting destinations that await you. If you’ve registered, you will be sent route map a few days before.

As you join World Zombie Day, please look out for our stewards who will provide you with wristbands. With a wristband, the Met Police know you are one of our horde. The wristband will also be printed with our contact details.

It is highly unlikely that you will need these contact details, and please don’t use them for fun even though it will be hilarious. These details are included in case our worst nightmares are made reality. This is your way to raise a Code Red, and a Code Red is going to be taken very seriously.

Belonging to the horde during the day will keep us all safe. If you are planning on attending the After Party, rest assured that The Piccadilly Institute has measures in place for this. Additional security and police will be patrolling too. We recommend that you join us there (£5 on the door or online ticket required) if you intend to stay in the area after the last stop. If you go elsewhere, you might want to avoid the West End.

As you leave the after-party and disperse into the city, you may encounter folks who (for some reason) fear zombies and the creeping mortality you represent. If you feel threatened or unsure, remove yourself from the situation and seek safety elsewhere. You might want to remove your makeup and prosthetics to prevent harassment. We cannot be sure where the thousands of “Football Lads Alliance” might end up, and some might be friendly, but we don’t want the unfriendly ones to end up with you.

The kind warning from the Met Police has understandably made everyone more alert. You can understand why it was important for us to share this information with you.

But the dead do not fear the living.

The living fear the dead.

You will not be alone.

Join us.